Laugh Out Loud- PG 13 Part 3

So along with the book "Eat, Pray, Love" I thought it would be fun to actually eat. pray. and love.

Eat: I asked the girls to each bring a bit of their favorite recipe to share.

Pray: One of the girls in the group practices mediation daily and I asked if she would lead us in a short and simply mediation.

Love: Bring an unwrapped toy to donate to a children's charity.

Most of the girls respond with wonderful enthusiasm.  That a book club like this was exactly what they were looking for.  Which worked out well, because, it was my book club and this is how I roll.

Shannon, yeah, not so much.  She decides that after the last email "confrontation" that a better route might be to have someone else do her dirty work.  In walks Anne.

Now Ann is young.  A graduate student with a boyfriend.  Which is of course why Shannon chose her...I said Shannon was crazy, not stupid.  

Anne emails me this:

I really love this book club and everything that you're doing for it! 

I wasn't sure how to write this though, and I really don't want you to take it the wrong way. I think that your ideas on how to add to the theme of the book are wonderful, It would be really great if in the future you could make them seem like a more optional activity. 

For this month, I'm a student and I really can't afford to bring a toy, it's hard enough for me to buy necessities for myself. I love doing community service and donating time and wish I could afford extras right now, but I can't. Meditation is not my thing and I am hesitant about going this month because I don't want to seem like an outsider for those two reasons. 

I'm afraid I'm going to come off as cheap. Again I think that they're good ideas, but I (and some others I've talked to) think it would be great to have people who want to meditate come at a certain time and those who don't come 15 minutes later or something. I'm really not trying to step on any toes or seem bitchy/prudish/whatever. I'm happy to bring food and wine and talk about the book and socialize, I look forward to it. Do you mind making the other stuff seem a little more optional in the future?

Again, thanks for everything you do. I've really enjoyed getting to know you and all of the other women in the group.
See you Monday,
Anne

First of all, after the age of 18, isn't everything outside of death and taxes optional?  Do I strike you all as the kind of person that would DEMAND mediation and charity for children?

And, Anne, is apparently so broke that she can't bring a small toy for a child in need, but food AND wine...no problem.  Also notice how she has spoken to "others members".  Yeah , don't start trying the gang mentality on me, I will take all three of you suckers on at once.  

This has got Shannon written ALL over it.

I respond to Anne:

As far as the meditation goes, we are talking like 5 minutes of quiet breathing... that's it. Many of us don't get a minute of time to ourselves, just wanted to provide the opportunity for a new experience.

While I am happy to make it clear that everything is optional, I will probably continue suggesting things to go along with the book, as for me, that is what the "fun" part of "Books, Wine and Fun" is all about.

I must tell you that your comment about other members (I'm guessing Joy and Shannon) feeling the same really didn't sit well with me. No one likes to feel as though their ideas have been discussed in a negative context.

So now it's out in the open that I know Shannon (Joy is somewhat of an innocent bystander taken hostage by Shannon) is behind it all.  I have full confidence that my response will be forwarded to Shannon.  And it is.

What happens next proved to be somewhat unbelievable.  As, while I have known all kinds of crazy in my 33 years, Shannon is truly a world class nut.  And, I have the emails to prove it. 

Here is just a teaser:

This little excerpt comes from Shannon's final (Thank God) email:

I don't want to feel like I have to walk on eggshells with you or scared that if I say something you will throw me out of the bookclub which is exactly what you have done...that's why I spoke with a few people over this past week to get advice from them on how to handle approaching you and talking to you.

Oh, and BTW, this chick, has met me once.  Once.  For an hour.  C.R.A.Z.Y

© 2008 The R Family Diaries.  All Rights Reserved.

Comments

Unknown said…
You always seem to get at least one in a group who is a wannabee Drama Queen/Control Freak (I gotta go to bed, I just tpped Drama as darama, 3 x before I got it right).
Manager Mom said…
It is amazing (and depressing) how the politics of being in a group NEVER END. You'd think when we were grownups, people could just be direct and straightforward instead of all of this "I had some people talk to some people" stuff...
~Sheila~ said…
ughh...Drama. Drama. Drama.

What would life be like without it and the people who provide it?

Either way. I'm addicted to other people's drama. I have gerbil drama so it really isn't the same.

Keep the story coming!!
S Club Mama said…
Wow, I never knew a book club would be drizzled with such drama. But I think the book club sounds amazing! And I know about being a cash-strapped student (and I was a wife & a mother besides that) and I would have spent $5 on a book or toy for a child. Jeez!
Anonymous said…
I cannot stand ladies who act like this. You would think they would have lost it after high school. Some people must have drama in their lives though.

Can't wait to see what happens next!
Amy said…
While yes she's obviously straight up whack you've got a good story here. So, maybe that was her purpose in your life, to entertain us. Thanks Shannon. My favorite part is Anne offering up food and wine but not some toy for a poor kid. You know I want to put fo shizzle in there.
Anonymous said…
I have to know.... does Shannon know about your blog and if so, has she tried to comment on this? It sounds like if she knew that you were posting this stuff she's going to REALLY get 10 different kinds of crazy! On a different note, you've inspired me to THINK about starting a book club. Fun! The kids toy was an awesome idea.
Anonymous said…
oops. I was supposed to put "Other Amy" Sorry!
LOONEY TUNES. Totally nuts. I also loved that ANne couldn't afford a small gift for a child but was happy to bring wine and food.
swilek said…
I LOVED your ideas for EAT PRAY AND LOVE! I read the book last summer...your creative ideas would have been welcomed!! It really is unbelievable isn't it how people can behave and believe they are doing the right thing...I am not fond of extreme controlling people! Can't wait to hear how the story ended...i am a bit confused..was it just an online club or you actually met in person?
Unknown said…
You really have some fun ideas...and yes as an ADULT everything is an option...She could have just come late...see how easy that would have been...and I know there are plenty of toys that cost less than a bottle of wine...well at least most wine...
Sherri said…
Why do people have to be like that!! Seriously ---I am bugged by that Anne girl!!
Sunshine said…
Sheesh...women.

So can I come to the book club? I'll be good. I promise.
Insane Mama said…
Crackers I tell you. Complete crackers!
Rhea said…
Sheesh, isn't the whole group OPTIONAL? No one's forcing her to join and go.

AND, I can buy a cheap toy at CVS for under $2, no offense to the poor college student (we've all been there).
Cecily R said…
Girls are so weird.

I love your ideas for implementing the theme of the book into your meeting. And I don't even drink wine. Or meditate (I can't focus that well after ten years of parenting. I try, but I always start singing the Dora the Explorer theme song or wondering about how I'm going to get marker out of her clothes again in the middle of "quiet time").

Do you think that if I were in your book club your cheif complaint about me would be that I don't talk enough? Yea, me neither.
Cecily R said…
Actually, your chIef complaint about me should be that I can't spell...
polkadot said…
well that stinks. what a bunch of fun-suckers! I will now meditate for 5 minutes, in solidarity with you ;)
Unknown said…
I think your party idea was awesome... wish I could have gone... maybe I will have to start my own book club here in Norway? And I L O V E stories about crazies.... makes me feel so much better about myself! ; )
Anonymous said…
Oh my! No charity, but food and wine...I was thinking exactly what you wrote when I was reading it! Amazed at the attitude from these gals...can't wait to read on.....BTW are you up in AH?
Debbie said…
Uh huh, yup. I have it all figured out. Shannon is married to Insane Mama's stalker, James. Or maybe they are one and the same?
Anonymous said…
There's always someone who has to ruin a group by acting like a moron. If they had problems with the club, then DON'T COME BACK. Duh.

By the way, I think I'm the only person alive who didn't like Eat, Pray, Love. It would have made a nice, fluffy magazine article in Cosmo, but a novel? Nah.
Kaza said…
This drama is so juicy!!! Love it! Anyway, she is a total nutbar. Can't wait to read the rest of her email! I think your book club sounds most excellent, and I hate book clubs, so that is actually a tremendous compliment. I'm reading that book right now... I find it not only fascinating but a truly relaxing read.
Alison said…
Sounds a lot like a Mom's Club I was in a couple of years ago. The president was insane. I am not even kidding. After five of us quit, later on the rest of the club kicked her out.
StacyRenee said…
I'm so glad I only get kiddy drama ~ well most of the time anyway. Love the blog it reminds me of our life in Colorado :) I think the toys for charity is a great idea. Wish more people would take the time to take care of our youth.
KimmyJ said…
Wow! If you don't like MY bookclub, don't come. How hard is that? "But I'm soooo scared you are going to throw me out of the book club, Wah, wah, wah" Crazy is right!
CaraBee said…
Their behavior sounds soo junior high. If they didn't like things why stir up all the drama, why not just drop out of the group. It's not like you guys had been doing it for years.

You make me want to start a book club! Minus the crazy, of course. Can't wait to hear the exciting conclusion!!
Sarah Taylor said…
Oh my! Keep it coming!
Sarah
Anonymous said…
You are making me want to come to your book club just to see what happens... I am in a group of 50 moms that do MNO and different fun events and it does get very high school. But it does make for great conversation ( the nice word for gossip in a way) I am putting you on my list for favorite blogs to read! Then I can keep coming back for more.
Are you kidding me? In case these two immature girls didn't catch the title of your club it is "Books, Wine and Fun" not "Brats, Whine and Flippin Crazy."

Good riddance.
Jennifer P. said…
I'm just warnin' ya to stay away from Heather's comments today. There's an awful lot of LOL-ing going on :)!

and just for the record---loved your idea of expanding on the book. Very un-egshelly like.
OMG!

So, Joy has the funds to purchase FOOD AND BOOZE but is talking about how she has no extra this month. Seriously, WTH?

PSYCHO!
Lex the mom said…
I was thinking the same thing as so many of you - that she could do the food & wine, but not the charity - it's just awkwardly wrong. & yeah, I think all adults know that if they don't want to do something, they don't have to.

The woman seems loopy & why stay in a group just to stir the pot?

I look forward to reading more. I also hope I don't give you the willies with my Truly closing. ;)
Kitty said…
Girls can be so LAME. You're book club sounds so cool. I can't wait to read the next "Drama Queen" segment. I love your blog.
HUGS,
Kat
Anonymous said…
Is it possible to start a book club without attracting the "crazies"?
Jen said…
At least Anne know what is important in life and is spending her money for a good cause; wine not toys for little kids. ;)
Oooo...I can't wait to read more. You definitely have me hooked.
Teri said…
Nut.Case.

And let me translate her email: "Oh, about me, then there's me, and some more me, and speaking me, how about me?"
Party of 5 said…
OH my. I had the exact same person try to "control" and "take over" my group. Only this group was for the support of Home Daycare provider's...LOL. Professional's you know. Me with only trying to help and give out information. My "Shannon" didn't like anything and managed to get one of the nebiews to start in on the same stuff she would "wine" about. It was insane and everyone saw her for what she was but no one was strong enough to tell her to "flip" off since in our group we HAD to include everyone. So much for being "supportive".
Heather said…
Who wouldn't want to drink wine and meditate????

I tried to start a book club on the Galactic Sac, but you can imagine how that went over. We read ONE book and disbanded. Of course, there was no one who didn't want to drink wine or meditate. In fact, that's all we did for four hours.

Shannon sounds like an instigator. I don't like instigators.
Anonymous said…
Geez...why didn't she just quit the book club (which she obviously didn't really want to do anyway) instead of being so dramatic...
Tracy P. said…
I think that for your next "love" project you should have all bought some school supplies to fill a new backpack for the poor grad school student.
Anonymous said…
Dear Mrs. R.

Check your e-mail now.

Sincerely,

Shannon
Tiffany said…
Anyonymous -

Do you know how I know that isn't Shannon?

She would have said "warmly, Shannon"

Good Try.
Scary Mommy said…
Oh, Lord. The drama!
I love your idea- Can I come to book club? :)
I so need to get to bed, but I needed to read your Shannon drama. Oh, man! Give us another serving of crazy!
Caroline said…
Hmmm, seems like somebody in that group has got enough money to buy the crazy crack that they're all smoking!
Lula! said…
I'm taking her down.

That's all I gotta say. 'Cause I know this ain't gonna end well and I've gotta be all righteous and get up in her grill. It will make me feel better.
-Bridget said…
You hosting a book club for Jr. high kids? Kick all of the little clicky, close minded, non-meditating, tightwad, uncharitable natches out and start over.
Anonymous said…
Holy Cow - this could be a soap opera, complete with pretend slaps across the face - what a nutty!
Melissa Lee said…
Did you ever see the trucker hat that says, "Are you stalking me? God, I hope so."

Well, I wish I had bought that hat right then and there.

Until I met Annie.

She loved me. I mean, she looooooovvveeeed me.

And I would receive these crazy emails and such...so honey, I feel your pain.

I giggled immediatly at the fact that she had already discussed this with some others. Yeah - you can spot a chick like that at a thousand paces.

Drop her. And fast.

I'll come to your bookclub. Did I hear you say, Merlot?
Jen said…
Wow, someone needs to tell her that her crazy is showing.

You've handled it like a super star. I'd probably go all Britney (think umbrella/car) on her rear!
Debz said…
crazazy with a capital cra.
katylinvw said…
o.m.w. ~ some people's kids! on what planet is this acceptable behavior?
suzspeaks said…
Ok, so I have been reading your archives! You are so funny... I can't believe this book club saga! It sounds like something I would love to be a part of...Shannon and Anne are crazy!

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